I don’t really write anymore. And it isn’t because I do not enjoy what used to be of utmost pacification –well, perhaps not utmost but on some high ranking of covert pleasure, like the way altruism feels, a secret sort of open-ended type of deed that is meant to fill the ambience with a floral aroma of goodness. Of righteousness? But it never really does. I suppose it never really did. I don’t think there was a flaw ever in and of itself — it was simply never meant to be enough.
I think at some point it is of some obligatory cognitive impetus to “smell” a goodness flying out of fingers typing or penning, but it’s a spiral that twirls downward, at least that is how it was for me, at least that is how I know it to be for all excellent writers. That was an inadvertently placed phrase implying I’m excellent (haha I don’t actually feel that way) which was quite hilariously placed.
Ah, whatever I don’t really write anymore. I have found other things to do — perhaps I may label them as hobbies as I did the first, I have found what I had been babbling about for a few months. Blah blah and blah purpose. But God has smoothed a path for me and I am grateful.
I suppose this is the remaining writer in me with its obnoxious convoluted circumvention wanting to say a message of a sentence in an essay. I suppose this is me saying good bye to this blog and what is in it, I suppose I can keep what’s on it running and I suppose it may not be a permanent end — although I am not too sure what is to be done to a platform unheeded. Algorithms don’t get tired I guess — so it’ll just stay.
It’s a tough one this time. Really really tough.
I love him, him and Ibi,
Nothing else matters but them two
Tests are remembered as more facile only
Because this one is the toughest.
Ah, man this one is tough.
There is not much more to say.
Patience, righteousness, firmament
And he will return. Gosh, why worry?
He’ll come back to you babe.
Disclaimer: This is a little reminiscent of my CWM series, but remains separate from it in various ways. Who cares anyway, right? I didn’t wish it so, but most of this is a played out reality. It reads a lot more melancholic than it is now — these are my thoughts spelled out as amateur analyses of memories I don’t want to completely let go of yet. And isn’t that what evincing is for? Continue reading “Ma”
I’m almost finished with writing this piece and have realized that the story I tell gradually declines into this deprived pool of self-pity and solitude. I can promise you Continue reading ““Evincing” pt. 2″
I came across a lovely blog with a lovely writing challenge! Mr. Dermott Hayes, the author, has kindly invited me to participate, a request which I could not decline. Continue reading ““Invitation” by Shel Silverstein”
This is not an easy thing. Addiction is never a topic that’s light on the tongue or smooth in the process, and part of that has to do Continue reading “Addiction of the Mind”
So I’ve been staying at a hotel for the past ten days and was planning on posting about one of two events: a really terrible thing that happened or the beauty of a lunar month.
Okay, they sound completely unrelated but they’re actually more intertwined than I’ve expatiated (although I believe a less broad Continue reading “I Lost My Phone”